Winter Warmers
The clocks have gone back, the evenings have become darker earlier, and the temperature is getting colder. So how do we keep the romantic temperature in our relationships up as the outside temperature falls? In Letters from a Birmingham Jail, Dr Martin Luther King Jr wrote:
We are living in challenging times. It is getting colder in the northern hemisphere. So, this season, why not resolve to be the thermostat and set your intention for a warmer winter in your relationship?
In those days the church was not merely a thermometer that recorded the ideas and principles of popular opinion; it was a thermostat that transformed the mores of society.
We can take this observation and apply it to our relationships. If we’re like a thermometer we reflect what is, based on how we think or feel, but if we’re a thermostat, we can set a desired outcome based on our intentions and decisions. So, with many of us facing a winter with varying degrees of Covid restrictions, now is the perfect time to consider becoming a thermostat. So, here are five ideas to help us set our intentions and “warm” our relationships this winter.- 1) Get board, not bored!
Board games enable us to practice patience, turn taking, team work, how to win and lose gracefully, and more importantly help us to “unplug” from technology. As much of our working day involves online interaction, playing a board game as a couple and as a family can be a great way to connect. - 2) Make a meal of your Date Night.
When you think of date night I wonder what comes to mind? A meal out perhaps? In the current climate we may need to get a little more inventive. Preparing for a romantic meal can be quite the appetiser for setting the thermostat even hotter. Creating your own atmosphere with table decorations, lighting and mood music sets the scene. Dressing up sets the intention. If you don’t fancy cooking on your own, why not try out a new recipe together or order a take away? If you have children, why not involve them (in an age appropriate way) in the table setting, meal preparation or serving? - 3) Embrace "Hygge".
Hygge (pronounced 'hoo-geh') comes from the Danish concept of cosiness and it involves simplicity of food, relaxation and snuggling! To set up a great couple Hygge evening you need a few props: Fairy lights, candles, warm blankets, hot drinks, wine, soup, bread and cheese, comfy clothes and cozy slippers or socks and a warm fire. Can you picture the scene? Hygge is about relaxing, being cozy, and cuddling up. Switch off your devices. Enjoying the simplicity of just being in each other’s company. - 4) Bubble over the bubbles.
Relaxing together in a bubble bath can be a great way to unwind from the stresses of the day. Perhaps a glass of bubbles and some nibbles can add to the ambiance along with some chilled tunes, soft lighting or candles. - 5) Develop your massage skills.
The benefits of massage include increasing a sense of connection, caring and comfort between spouses. Find a comfortable location and create a warm relaxing atmosphere. Use massage oil with a smell that you and your partner both like and find soothing. Experiment with different strokes, pressures and rhythms on different parts of your partner’s body and ask them to give you feedback on what feels good to them. Hopefully, they will offer to swap places with you too!
We are living in challenging times. It is getting colder in the northern hemisphere. So, this season, why not resolve to be the thermostat and set your intention for a warmer winter in your relationship?