40 Days of Love in Lent

Lent is a great time to be intentional. It is a time to pray and to fast and to reflect on Jesus and on his sacrifice for us, in the run up to the celebration of Easter.

Over the years I have tried many different things over Lent from reflective readings, giving up alcohol, 40 acts of service, ditching the chocolate, taking up exercise and carving out special prayer times. Some were definitely more successful than others!

Lent is often a time when as Christians we decide to give up something or alternative to take up something. And forty days (or 46 if you count Sundays) is the perfect amount of time to make or break a habit.

This year I’ve decided to be intentional about my marriage as part of my Lent offering. Here are 40 ideas to get you started or you might want to come up with your own. Will you join me?

1. 1) Tell your husband or wife one thing you really appreciate about them.


2. 2) Pray for your spouse and ask God for an encouragement for them.


3. 3) Go for a walk together, just the two of you.


4. 4) Ask your partner about their childhood memories and learn new things about them.


5. 5) Give your husband or wife a hug for no reason at all.


6. 6) Ask your spouse how you can pray for them today.


7. 7) Watch a favourite film or programme together.


8. 8) Plan an activity that they would love for you to do together.


9. 9) Find an old photo of the two of you and reminisce about a happy time together.


10. 10) Take time to discuss three goals for this year that you would like to achieve together.


11. 11) Give your partner a massage.


12. 12) Discuss ways you can serve together and make some plans to achieve this.


13. 13) Make plans to meet up on Zoom with a couple that inspire you or that you can be accountable to.


14. 14) Plan a date soon to make love and ask them what would make it special for them.


15. 15) Turn off the TV, screens and phones and spend an hour focused on listening to your spouse.


16. 16) Tell your husband or wife what you are grateful to them for.


17. 17) Play a game together. It could be a board game, a card game or any other game that you'd both enjoy.


18. 18) Cook or order in a meal that they would love.


19. 19) Kiss for two minutes.


20. 20) Discuss what God is doing in your lives at the moment, together and separately.


21. 21) Buy or make you partner a gift that you know that they would appreciate.


22. 22) Put on some music, light some candles and have a meal together at home.


23. 23) Plan an activity that neither of you has done before that you can do after lockdown is over.


24. 24) Say “sorry” for anything you need forgiveness for.


25. 25) Talk about places you would like to visit or travel to together post COVID-19.


26. 26) Encourage a friend or family member in need together.


27. 27) Thank God for your marriage and your spouse.


28. 28) Review your roles and responsibilities and revise any that need changing.


29. 29) Discuss a challenge in your marriage and look for “us” solutions together.


30. 30) Listen to a marriage talk or read a relationship book and discuss it.


31. 31) Discuss together what you want to do differently after lockdown.


32. 32) Discuss your values together. What do you want your marriage to be about?


33. 33) Talk positively of your spouse to someone else today.


34. 34) Leave loving notes for your partner to find today or send texts with special messages.


35. 35) Ask someone to pray for your marriage.


36. 36) Make sure you speak or do at least 5 positive things for every one negative on.


37. 37) Make love at a different time of day or in a different location to normal.


38. 38) Do a job that you would normally expect your partner to do.


39. 39) Have a pillow fight or do something silly that will make you giggle.


40. 40) Share your hopes and dreams for the future and pray about them.